My Christmas Gifts

Well, it's Christmas in Taiwan. Merry Christmas to you all. I'm at school waiting for class to start. Were it not for the months-long reminders from the Christmas tree in the lobby and the carols playing at the coffee stand out front, all ostensibly building up to today, it would be a day just like any other. I've been abroad over Christmas before, but this time it just feels different. Yesterday I heard a student wishing her (much older) teacher a merry Christmas, and the response was "Well, everyday should be happy, not just Christmas." She's right, of course, but I couldn't help being taken aback a bit by what seemed like a 'scrooge-like' response. She basically repudiated all those making a deal out of the holiday, most of whom just think it's fun and want to have a good time. I guess maybe she's just not sure what to make of all the Christmas hubbub. I must admit that I've had sort of the same attitude here this year.

As I'd written earlier, the Christmas trees and songs in the stores have been up and on since at least Thanksgiving, and my nephews have been singing Christmas carols in English that they learned in school, and seem to know nearly as many as I did at that age. Almost. I know it's "my culture" and it might make it seem more "like home", and I should feel honored, perhaps. But as a participant here, and putting aside all the obvious issues of cultural imperialism, it just seems to be a hollow shell of what Christmas is supposed to be about. Personally, I could do without the imported 'festivity', the empty jingles and glitz, the 'civil religious' practices that commercialism feeds upon. It feels like the shallow skin was skimmed off the warm milk of Christmas and that's all I'm left with; all of the symbols, none of the meaning. I guess it just leaves me feeling a bit empty inside. Even the Christmas service I attended at church on Saturday, which was geared entirely toward children, left me wanting for a bit more. I never minded this so much in my other times abroad, but I guess it now just makes me feel farther from home.

I think, in response, the last few weeks I've been trying to combat the reminders, hoping Christmas really would be a day just like any other. I didn't really even participate in giving gifts this year. But, like Scrooge, it didn't seem to work that way for me. Ok, no visits from ghosts of any kind, but let me just say I encountered some very fine gifts that made it a memorable season.

I've really enjoyed the care package that Mom sent. It was nice to receive the Christmas cookies and 'stocking gifts' and calendar (homemade this year!), so at least I was able to enjoy some things of the season. The last few days, though, YT had been singing Christmas carols to me by webcam. I could really only listen, because the time delay didn't really allow singing in unison. I don't know why, but that gesture filled me with a different sense of nostalgia each time, various visions of Christmas past. Most of the time it made me feel like a kid back at Grandma's house. More effective than Bing Crosby, it was truly the gift of the Christmas spirit.

The other came yesterday on Christmas Eve, and it was one of those that you never see coming. I met with my 'culture' class teacher, where we often discuss things about history and politics. She just asked how I celebrated Christmas this year, and I explained that I went to the Christmas service at church, but since it was mostly geared toward children it wasn't quite the same (of course) in my own experiences. She acknowledged that the expression of Christmas here must seem 'shallow', and that I must miss being around others with the same beliefs and traditions. I can't remember exactly how she said it, but it rather hit the nail on the head. I felt like she was the first person here that really understood, and that felt very good. That was a nice gift in itself.

But then she asked me to explain a bit more, and I talked about Christmas Eve services at home and the music and singing. Then she also asked what the word 'Christ' meant, and I basically expounded on the concepts of the Messiah, the context of Rome and the Jewish power structures at the time, and God in Jesus as the 'servant-leader'; essentially, the foundations of my faith. Ok, it was mostly me talking, with my teacher correcting grammar usage and vocabulary as needed. However, she has had some of these questions for many years, and genuinely wanted to know. I don't know what she thought at the end, but the discussion helped me turn myself around and realize again that Christmas isn't really about gifts and decorated trees, of course, and it isn't only about spending time with family and friends and like-minded people. It was a needed reminder that Christmas is about Jesus, pure and simple. That is the best gift of them all -- the 'true' meaning of Christmas.

I will leave you with that, and with wishes for a truly Merry Christmas. BB

Happy holidays

This is going to be a very different Christmas for me.

I've been having trouble getting my advisor to read my dissertation. Many reasons, but I'll just say that it's almost all written and the rest of it is basically out of my control now. So, my original defense date in December was postponed to January. There has been a lot of discussion with Brian about whether I should go back to Taiwan now and return to the US in April to defend my dissertation, or just hang in there for a couple more weeks and go home with a PhD degree. And I/we chose the latter. I double-confirmed with my advisor today, and he said that I will be able to defend in mid-January. But, knowing him, I guess I'll have to wait and see. But I'm optimistic and feel good about it.

So, this is going to be a difficult Christmas for me. I not only have to work a lot on the finishing touches of my dissertation, as well as the presentation for the defense, but I also have to do it during the "supposed-to-be-happy" holiday season without Brian. I do miss Brian and my family a lot, but I really want to get rid of the PhD burden ASAP so that I can enjoy my time in Taiwan with them more fully.

I won't be totally left alone for the holidays, though, even though most of my friends will be out of town. Some good friends are coming back to Pittsburgh for a family visit, and I'll spend a morning with them. Also, Brian's parents will arrive in Pittsburgh this weekend and we will have our own family Christmas (with Chad too, of course), and then they will head on to Lancaster, PA for the extended family Christmas gatherings. (I'm sorry that I won't be there this year, but I hope you all have a great time.) A friend from PMC (Pittsburgh Mennonite Church) also invited me over to her house on Christmas day, so I think I'll be doing alright. At least I'll be productive and also have a little bit of fun as well.

It's a nice feeling knowing that the road to the PhD is coming to an end. There is still a chance that I won't get enough feedback on my dissertation over the holidays, but I can only keep praying that this won't happen again. So, your prayer will be very appreciated.

That's all for now. Hopefully my next post will deliver you good news.

Wish you all a happy holiday and a wonderful year of 2008.

Yahtyng

No white Christmas for me

So, some of you might know that Christmas is one of my favorite times of year. I think it mainly has something to do with celebrating the holidays together with my aunts & uncles and cousins at Grandma and Grandpa's (both my mom & dad's sides). I've always enjoyed the annual ritual of piling into the car early in the morning and driving, not just over the river and through the woods, but basically all across Ohio and western and central Pennsylvania. It was a long trip. My brother and I spent many a good hour making up games, reading good books, getting dad to tell us stories, fighting as kids do, watching the traffic and scenery go by, and enjoying captive but quality family time.

Getting there was only part of the fun, of course. I've always enjoyed being with relatives and hanging out with cousins, and I value the sense of shared history and traditions that have accrued over the years. Things are, of course, different now that the family has multiplied, and not only cousins, but cousins-in-law and first-cousins-once-removed have added to our ranks. We've been nearly running out of space at Grandma's for quite a while, and this year my aunt's mother is farming out their space to us. Grandma's still cooking, though : ). So, the traditions carry on, but evolve over time. I guess that's how things go.

The 25th would be just another day here in Taiwan, but the Christmas trees have been up since at least Thanksgiving, and the Christmas carols have been playing on the radio for many weeks. My nephew and niece have been singing the carols they know and asking me how you say 聖誕老人 (shengdan lao ren; lit. 'Christmas Old Man') in English (Santa Clause, of course). Mom and Dad put up their Christmas tree, too (above), like they do every year. It would almost be just like home ('secularly' or 'commercially', at least), except the temperatures are still in the 'balmy' mid-to upper-60s. There's no heating in the home, though, and Mom & Dad often keep some of the windows open for fresh air (I guess). No White Christmas, but it will still feel a bit chilly : )

So, like other times I've been abroad and missed the holidays, I'll be listening to Handel and Bing Crosby, wishing for Christmas turkey and Grandma's cookies and jello salads, and thinking of everyone. There was one year in China I actually sang "I Wish Me a Merry Christmas", but at least this year I'll have family around to sing it properly.

Merry Christmas and happy holidays to you all, BB

Finding my Inner Fish

Ok, I have to admit, it has been apparent to me for a while that I don't quite get enough exercise. Back in the States I liked to go biking or walking in the park on occasion, and that kept me in generally decent shape. I really like hiking, too, and though there's lots of places to hike in Taiwan (very mountainous), a lot of the trails are paved and have stairs. That's just not the kind of hiking I like to do. So, between that and having no bike of my own, I'd sort of trailed off in terms of the exercise I was getting.

Then I started to notice that, for some reason, I felt like I was gaining weight. Maybe I've been eating more than usual, too. It's seems like there's always eating to be done, and YT's mom always cooks a lot. Very healthy, mind you, but still a lot, plus it's good. There's also the style of eating, in terms of the "just keep taking from the common dish in front of you until you're full" style, rather than the "here's your portion, when you finish that you can maybe have more" style of eating. There is research which shows that portions do make a difference in how much you eat, at least with bowls of soup -- if they're surreptitiously being filled by a hose at the bottom then people eat a lot more (really, it won an 'Ig Noble Prize' in 2007).

I'm also approaching another half-decade marker, and not for the first time in my life, I got that sinking suspicion that I'm not as young as I used to be. I had one of those experiences where it didn't really look like me in the mirror, rather someone who looked like me except a little plumper around the tummy and older. Honestly, I could have sworn I was 25 just yesterday. As John Updike wrote in Rabbit Run, "All men are boys time has deceived". Darn you, time!

So, either to recapture my youth or peel back the kilograms I've recently accrued, I've started a self-regulated twice-a-week swimming regimen. "Swimming?" you are probably thinking to yourself, "Brian you're not a swimmer!" And you'd be right, especially if you see what swimming seems to mean in Taiwan. It does not mean simply lounging around in the water, or seeing how long you can tread in one place, or how long you can hold your breath, or jumping off the diving board trying to catch a tennis ball in mid-air, or playing water basketball with your friends. Nope, it means propelling yourself through various paddling and kicking methods from one end of a pool of water to the other in a straight line back and forth until you don't feel like doing it anymore. You even have to wear a swimming cap and a speedo-style suit, though it doesn't have to be tighty-whities length. There are also a lot of people in the pool, and you have to try to time your journey to the other side so you don't bump into someone in your lane. It also seems apparent to me that everyone else has been trained in how to actually swim, different from my own pre-school lessons in 'how not to die if you happen to fall in the water'. Here, it's almost like you're watching the Olympics, except you're the one that's swimming, and, you're not in the Olympics, and, you're not even competing, you're just there going back and forth. But otherwise, almost the same, I think. So, though I have long-ago graduated from the doggie-paddle to a freestyle manner copied intuitively from watching TV, I still feel comparatively like, if you'll allow, a fish out of water.

My general method has been to whirl my arms and kick, turning my head from side-to-side but keeping my mouth above the water so I can spit and gasp for air as needed. If I don't do my impersonation of the freestyle, I do a sort of modified backstroke. I just kind of float on my back and wave my arms from my elbows so I move around. I guess if one were to see it in action, one might describe it as a sort of doggie-paddle backstroke with your arms at your side. Maybe. Come to think of it, it might also resemble the propulsion method of a single-celled organism. Either way, you may perhaps be able to see why I'd feel sort of conspicuous, especially if you knew that no one else seemed to be doing anything upside down. Given the population density of the pool and the restricted field of view of being on your back, I guess that makes sense. I still sort of prefer this, though; the distinct advantage being that my ears are submerged so my mouth doesn't have to be. It's actually rather relaxing, too, if you can get past the paranoia of running into something or someone.

Then one day, I decided I'd had enough of the modified doggie-paddle backstroke. It was relaxing, but I was just going too slow. I figured if I'm going to go back and forth in a straight line, there's no point in drawing it out. In a fit of inspiration, I decided to try whirling my arms like the backstroke is maybe supposed to be done. To my surprise, it almost felt as if I'd just sprouted fins. The roof above me sped by, and before I knew it I had passed under the flags, then the metal ladder out of the pool went by, then came the wall (bonk). I felt even more conspicuous than before, but I didn't care. It felt good. I even got a brief impression of admiring looks from the lifeguards and other swimmers, like "What is that method of swimming? Is that a backstroke? Wow! Who does the backstroke in a pool with this many people?"

You may think this was pure delusion, perhaps brought on by lack of oxygen to the brain (I do have exercise-induced asthma at times), but consider the following. After my usual soak in the steam-room, I went back into the smaller practice pool for a last couple of laps. There was also an older man there in the pool with a woman, who, incidentally, seemed to be less than his age. I did my interpretation of the freestyle one way, as I normally would, and then my backstroke impersonation on the way back. As I was bumping into the wall, he said "Very good!", in English, as people sometimes do when they want to sound cosmopolitan but don't have an extensive English vocabulary. I could only assume he meant my backstroke, of course, because it was so impressive. He also complimented me on my freestyle, though too, which, he said, was special because I could keep my head up for air. I knew that just creates more drag, but I didn't feel like arguing. He then jovially challenged me to a friendly race to the other side, which of course he won, to his delight. Once his 'friend' joined us again, he asked me how often I go swimming, then he said I should go at least 3 times a week like he does. Ok, I said, trying not to roll my eyes. Not surprisingly, I haven't really seen the guy or his lady-friend since. However, I have noticed more people trying to do the backstroke.

I of course don't take any credit for that, but it makes me feel good as I backpedal through the water, digging deep with my hands on the push-stroke, feeling the current rush through my fingers. The roof zips by overhead, and six strokes after I pass under the flags my hand brushes the wall. I'm still awkward at it, and no professional of course, but at the end of the day, I'm back to thinking I'm 25 years old. I'm still basically the same shape as when I measured my weight in pounds, but the best part is, I know my lady-friend doesn't really mind either way.

Still making waves, BB

Camping with the Sheu Family

Yes, that's right. I went camping with YT's family in the middle of November. I had heard that camping in Taiwan generally meant cramped spaces, noisy neighbors, and loud karaoke; namely, the kind of camping I would want to avoid like the plague. So, I wasn't really sure what to expect. I must say, though, it was rather nice. No karaoke (thankfully), only one set of neighbors we hardly noticed, and a beautiful location on the side of a mountain overlooking a long narrow valley. Ok, actually it would have been very beautiful had there not been a cloud filling the valley and obstructing our view. That only became clear early in the morning the next day when I got up to go to the bathroom. There were no clouds in the sky, and I could tell that the valley was very expansive. The sun wasn't up yet, though, and all I could really see was just the back-lit silhouette of the mountain on the other side of the valley. To be honest, I couldn't really see anything; but I could feel, I could sense, that in optimum conditions it would be quite beautiful. At least, I'm pretty sure. I went back to bed, then when I got up the cloud was back again.

All in all, I'd have to say that camping in Taiwan is quite similar to camping in the states. I'm talking the typical 'refugee' camping, as a good friend puts it. That is, take your family and pack up your provisions and shelter, set up your new living quarters on a small spat of land, then live without all the usual amenities or comforts of home and try to make the best of it. We even had nearly the whole family there, at least it felt like it to me. There were more than 20 of us, including kids. That's right, more than 20. I guess, come to think of it, there were 'noisy neighbors', but they were us. So, ok, I guess a big difference is that I wouldn't normally go camping with that many people.

The only other main difference I noticed in camping practices was the campfire. First, there almost wasn't one. That, to me, is almost unfathomable. The fire wasn't started until many hours after we got there, whereas were it up to me it would be ablaze the second after the tents are posted. My favorite part of camping is the campfire. The ability to harness such a dazzling and fierce power of nature within a ring of stones is amazing, and I'll watch it like TV until late at night. That it provides a method of cooking is just secondary, the hotdogs and S'mores are simply a nice bonus. Second, there were no S'mores or roasted hotdogs. But, I'm not really considering 'food' within the camping practices, otherwise the list would go on and on, so I'm not sure whether it should count. Third, or second, is that we burnt grass, not tree. That is, dried bamboo, not wood. It was cut in half lengthwise, because if left whole it can be sort of dangerous. The sections encase large pockets of air, and if put directly into the fire they will build up enough pressure to pop. I've seen it done. Anyway, as you might expect, it burnt quickly, and it sometimes lost it's 'flame'. But, since I love managing the campfire as much (or more?) as I love watching it, I didn't mind so much.

Oh yeah, there was also actual dancing around the fire. That's right. Some of the kids led some people in an aboriginal folk dance they had learned in school, which is definitely not something I would experience on a typical camping excursion in the US. Oh, also, there was also a 'game' played with the bamboo sheaths before they were burnt. It took 4 sticks, two set lengthwise a distance apart like wide train tracks, then the other two were set perpendicular on top, so it made sort of a figure just like this: # (or see photo). Two people held the top set of sticks and beat them in a certain rhythm, moving them outwards on a certain beat. Then others stood in the middle and did a dance and sang a song stepping in and out of the moving sticks, trying not to get their ankles clipped. Okay, one more thing: some among the 20 of us slept in their SUVs. I'm sure it's done in the US, but I've never witnessed it myself. As for the rest of the time, the pictures, posted here, tell the whole story pretty well.

The most memorable event of the weekend was hiking up the mountain with mom & dad. Some of the kids started to go, too, but it was too long and steep for them, so they didn't really even make it far out of the camp. I've always had immense respect for YT's parents, but I must say I was really impressed with how they tackled this mountain. It was pretty steep at times, enough that 'steps' were cut into the earth and ropes were strung up to provide something to hang on to, but they handled it as if they were 30 years younger. They do go hiking nearly every weekend, but not quite like this. I really like this picture of YT's mom:
I think it says a lot, but I'm not going to attempt a wordy and pretentious deconstruction of it for you. However, I do want to point out that mom & dad witnessed immense economic and political change during their lives. They saw farmland turn to shopping mall and parking garage, and martial law turn to vibrant but contentious democracy, and they rose along with it. It's not called the "Taiwan miracle" for nothing. Mom & Dad's parents were either farmers or manual laborers. Mom went to a technical college (專科) and became an elementary teacher. Dad also had post-secondary schooling, and went from a local government job to a city government job, to his current position second from the top in a private company (well, it's a very small company, but still). Their current house was built just a few years ago on the 'ancestral' farmland where Dad grew up, which he still tills now during his free time. They both continue to work extremely hard, and this picture, to me, somewhat reflects the spirit and drive of their generation that made the 'miracle' possible. Either that, or a cigar's a cigar and it's just a photo of someone climbing a mountain trail. Up to you, I guess.

So, I'll leave you with that. Oh yeah, I did have 'turkey-wings' when we were camping, which was the closest I came to having turkey around Thanksgiving. They were imported from the US, and sold here really cheap because we don't eat turkey wings in the US, unless they're bought as part of the whole bird and roasted in the oven with everything else. Even then, we probably don't eat them, I'd wager. It wasn't quite the same as 'real' Thanksgiving turkey, of course, and to be honest, I wouldn't even say it was 'better than nothing'. I actually almost forgot about the holiday until I realized YT wasn't available to chat because she was travelling at that time to spend the holiday with my family. Then, I was almost late to class because I was chatting with the cousins after their big meal at my parents', or rather 'viewing' them and texting since the audio didn't work on their end. But, it was good to see them all, and lots of fun as usual. I guess the internet is a big something to be thankful for.

Ok, I do need to go. I'm also thankful for your time. Take care and God bless, BB

小小感觸

在婚姻裡
有些事或感覺真的不需要和對方說
尤其當局外人的話 會傷到對方的感受

人生就是會這樣

我想每個人都遇過這樣的情形

明明自己不知道該怎麼做

看電影去

最近心理壓力很大
不知道什麼時候才能口試
不知道老師到底有沒有認真在看我的paper

From the wife

As Brian said, this is "our" blog, so I think I ought to write something too.

There is really not much to say about my life now, though, since I'm spending as much time as I can working on my dissertation. I scheduled a date for my defense (let's not reveal that in case I have to postpone it) and I'm trying my best to finish quickly. So, I'm busy most of the time, but I do feel lonely...even with the company of my wonderful roommate, May, and my always-hungry cat, Oliver. It is nice to have someone that I can talk to and have dinner with everyday. But still, I miss spending time with Brian.

It has been a difficult and stressful time for me to manage my dissertation, parting from my husband, and a little bit of job searching. I'm pretty fortunate that I never really had a sleeping problem before in the past (knock on wood), but I have started to experience difficulty falling asleep in the last couple days. Plus, Oliver has been waking me up really early in the morning by creating all sorts of noise, stepping on my body or rubbing his face against mine because he is starving. The video below pretty much captures it.


In the past two weeks, he has finished his food within an hour or two, and the rest of the night, he has nothing to eat. Does a cat's eating patterns change due to weather?? Maybe he just misses his daddy too much that he turns his frustration into eating (I'm glad that I don't have this problem).

But I'm doing alright. I just try to do my best and try not to worry too much. Nobody says that life is easy....I just have to deal with it. Just hope that the process can be short and smooth.

Well, I got to go....

By Yahtyng

My life

There is really not much to say about my life now. I'm spending as much time as I could working on my dissertation. I scheduled a date for my defense (let's don't reveal it in case I have to postpone the date) and try my best to finish my dissertation. I'm busy most of the time, but I do feel lonely...even with the company of my wonderful roommate, May, and my always-hungry cat, Oliver. It is nice to have someone that I can talk to and have dinner with everyday. But still, I miss spending time with Brian(physically).

It has been a difficult and stressful time for me to manage among dissertation, parting from husband, and a little bit of job searching. I'm a pretty fortunate person that I never really have sleeping problem before(knock on the wood). But I have started to experience difficulty falling into sleep in the last couple days. In addition, Oliver has been waking me up so early in the morning by creating all sort of noise, stepping on my body or rubbing his face against mine because he is starving. In the past two weeks, he has finished his food within an hour or two, and rest of the night, he had nothing to eat. Does a cat's eating pattern change due to weather change?? Maybe he just misses his daddy too much that he turns his frustration into food. (I'm glad that I don't have this problem)

But I'm doing alright. I just try to do my best and try not to worry too much. Nobody says that life is easy....I just have to deal with it. Just hope that the process can be short and smooth.

Well, I got to go....

Funeral -- La Fin

Hey everyone, before you say anything, I just want you to know that, yes, I realize that a long time has passed since I've written anything. YT and I are settling in to our respective situations, and life is moving on for each of us; separately, yet together, somehow. We do what we have to do, and the nightly (for me) chats do help a lot. I do miss seeing more than a 4-inch 2-dimensional representation of my wife, but I know the time will pass. Stupid green card, or rather, conditional green card status.

So, you may be wondering what has been going on since YT left, besides a longing for her quick return. I would be lying if I said 'nothing', though, so I'll try to catch up a bit. I guess one of the most memorable things has been the conclusion of YT's grandfather's funeral. The final burial was a couple of weeks ago (middle of October). Since I last wrote about it, there were special occasions for different members to perform different rituals according to their relationship. I didn't have to attend any of those, but I was told to keep the whole day free for the final service, the events of which I am about to describe. A quick aside: please excuse my general ignorance of the meaning of what I observed. YT said that even her family often doesn't know what some of the rituals mean or represent, so I don't feel too bad. Still quite curious, but I don't have time for a degree in Chinese or Taiwanese religious studies it might require.

The final service started rather early in the morning, for me it mostly involved a lot of standing in confused ignorance of what was going on, sometimes with a mix of needing to bow at an appropriate time. A monk was at the front with a mic ceremoniously directing everything. I was standing with all the male relatives along one side of the aisle, with all the women on the other side of the aisle. We all had to wear special clothing that signified our relation to grandfather, too. The whole affair was designed to pay great honor to YT's grandfather's spirit and ensure a comfortable afterlife, but it also seemed mainly, as characterized in the past by YT, to seek grandfather's good will so that he might bestow great blessings from the afterlife. Here's the general scene before things got started.


What I observed was basically a ritualistic 'This-is-your-life' kind of thing that involved a procession of family and friend groups, organized by relation to the deceased. Instead of a prolonged recounting of character-revealing stories or events of the past, it involved a systematic progression where each individual group took turns prostrating on their knees, standing up and inching forward in unison, then doing it again and again (3 times total). Then, the first person in the group poured three small shots of alcohol into a basin, though I don't know why. I couldn't follow all of the groups that took a turn, but the order went something like this: remaining brothers and sisters, then remaining cousins, then sons, then daughters, then spouses of sons and daughters, then grandchildren, then spouses of grandchildren, then great-grandchildren, then (and I'm almost serious) anyone left over who apparently felt they had a legitimate claim to relation with the deceased. At least, it got to the point where even my father-in-law did not know who the people were, but he guessed 2nd or 3rd or more distant cousins. By the amazing powers of the internet and digital technology, you can get a brief 18sec sense of the sights and sounds here, more than that which static images have to offer.

I can't recall how long that process took, mainly because the basic process wasn't over yet. The tables and flowers in the middle of the aisle were removed to make room for another set of people to progress in waves. Basically, representatives of different groups that grandfather had been involved with in the past came to pay public respect. There was no prostrating this time, though. One person in the group held up in 'offering' a plate with a piece of fruit on it, then the same with a flower-wreath. Then they all bowed at the waist to the men's side, then to the women's side, which is where the bowing aspect came in. Each step was systematically orchestrated and announced by the monk on the mic. Then it was the next group's turn to shuffle down the aisle, and the process was repeated. I think YT's grandfather must have been involved with a number of different organizations throughout his life, because it seemed like a lot, and they all showed up. This includes, for instance, people from the primary school where he attended, ninety years ago. In some cases, someone read a brief statement, and in other cases the apple was not 'offered up', or a glass of white alcohol was offered as well. I might have been able to figure out why had I not been completely bored out of my skull. Luckily, by the time I was just about to invent creative ways to bow ceremoniously without appearing disrespectful, I saw that they were almost done. Well, with that part, at least.

The next section involved more movement, which was very nice since my muscles were stiff from standing for nearly three hours. The coffin was loaded onto a truck and we walked through the road following the truck through town. I should mention the two other accompanying trucks that were filled with musicians blowing horns and banging gongs (pic). The louder the better, because it drives away harmful spirits.
.

While the truck with the coffin continued up into the mountain to the burial plot, the rest of us got on a bus. I had a nice talk with Caro on the way, the younger of YT's older sisters. She said that she wished there were more things done to remember who her grandfather was, and she said didn't like all the time these funerals consume. I talked about how funerals in the Christian tradition are more a memorial to the deceased, a remembrance of the past, and a celebration of that person's life (and 'reunion' with God). I said I was honored to be able to take part in these ceremonies, but I also missed learning more about grandfather's life, and what kind of person he was and the personal influence he has had on those around him. I know he was a stonecutter, but the rest of the stuff I can only guess at. I also said the funerals there only last a couple of days, including the wake. Caro said she'd prefer that sort of system, too.

But, to continue on, there were more ceremonies at the burial site after we got there. Rather than a six-foot hole in the ground, it resembled a small notch cut out of the mountain. We stood there while the coffin was arranged in it's proper 'feng shui' alignment and then finally covered up. Then, someone prepared the headstone while more paper money was burnt and food was offered up. After this, everyone proceeded to march around the grave three times, though I only wish I could say why. Then grandchildren received a few coins and a number of nails, which I was told represents a wish for a successful future and birth of sons to continue the family name. Finally, someone chanted and banged cymbals loudly for a few minutes, to 'purify' the area of negative spirits, and then we all headed back for a late banquet lunch.

Afterwards I went home for a good rest and a long nap. It still wasn't over yet, though. I was awakened around 5pm with news that later that evening the 'house' was going to be burnt. That is, the ceremonial house that was bought for grandfather, which represents the wish for him to have a palatial dwelling-place in the afterlife. There was even a cardboard helicopter and a Mercedes (pic) in the 'courtyard' of the house so that he could travel around freely. After another huge pile of paper money was burnt, as well as other rituals described in a previous post, the house was loaded in pieces onto a truck and carted out to an empty field between two busy roads. The ceremonial clothing was removed and set aside to burn, along with everything else associated with the funeral that could be consumed by flames. More paper money was loaded into the house, then it was lit. As YT's uncle said, it cost hundreds of US dollars, and in three minutes it was gone. Nothing too exciting, but I have a short video of it below.

So, I guess that's all I have to say right now. It was a long and busy day, and it's obvious that people care very much for their family. I do feel priviledged to have participated in the service, and honored to be a part of the whole family. I'll leave it at that, though, since it has probably been a long post already. I'll try not to go so long before the next post is up. Okay, gotta go.

Talk to you all later. BB

My Charming Wife

Ok, we were recently assigned to give a speech in class describing a special person, whether it's someone we know personally or not. Yeah, I know, it's not rocket science -- but it is L2 learning (I'm at the upper-intermediate level, and still in the 'reviewing' stage of my current studies). Anyway, guess who I decided to talk about? Correct, it wasn't Joe DiMaggio. Apparently people in class liked my short speech, since it won the most votes (yay). I thought I'd take the chance to share it, since it accurately reflects my state of mind right now, plus some of you might get to know YT better this way -- at least, from my naturally biased perspective.

The translation is my own, and of course it sounds a lot better in Chinese (eg, not as awkward or overbearing), I find I can't get around 'Chinglish' in translation. Anyway, here you go.

"If I'm asked to describe a person with 'charm', of course I will think about my wife. She is a very special person, and there isn't anyone else in the world like her, she has so many good qualities. She is very beautiful and smart, very generous, and has a good sense of humor.

Although she was born and raised in Taiwan, we got to know each other in the US. Like me, she is also a PhD student at the University of Pittsburgh, but we are in very different fields. She is studying public health, and is researching osteoporosis in men. Because her research is related to medicine, she can use some English words that many native English speakers don't know. Although her work is very serious/important, she also likes to 'play', loves going out with friends, and likes to make jokes.

She is rather extroverted, and easily shows how she is feeling and what she's thinking. Actually, when she was young, her family said she had a bad temperament because she can get upset easily. But she really only gets upset when she sees or feels that a situation is 'unjust', so I don't think it's a bad temperament. Instead she's very generous, easily mindful of others, and has a strong sense of honor.

Her sense of humor can sometimes be like a child's. She often 'performs' with our cat, making him sing 'Happy Birthday' to me {posted, couldn't resist} or a self-written song like 'Daddy We Miss You'. She's now in the US and will return after she finishes writing her dissertation, so we can only see each other over the internet.

She is a very 'vivacious' person, and when she smiles it's like everything brightens up. When I'm with her, everything is fun and interesting. I'm so captivated, it's no wonder she was willing to marry me. [haha]

Thank you everyone."

如果我要形容一位有魅力的人，我當然會想到我的老婆。她是很特別的一個人，我覺得世界上都沒有一個人比得上她，她有那麼多優點。她不但漂亮，而且聰明，很大方，很幽默。

雖然她是土生土長的台灣人，可是我們是在美國認識的。她跟我一樣在匹茲堡大學念博士，可是我們的專業完全不一樣。她是學公共衛生的，她研究的是男性骨質疏鬆症。因為她的研究跟醫科有關係，所以她會用一些一般說英語的人都不會的英文單字。雖然她的工作很重，她也是很喜歡玩，愛跟朋友聊聊，喜歡開玩笑的。

她的個性比較外向，容易讓別人看穿她的情緒、她的看法。其實她小時候家人覺得她的脾氣不太好,因為她很容易生氣。 可是其實只有看到或感覺到不公平的事情她才會生氣，所以我不覺得她的脾氣壞。反而覺得她很大方，很容易體諒別人，很有正義感。

她的幽默有時候會像小孩子。她常常和我們的貓一起表演，讓我們的貓為我唱 'Happy Birthday' 的歌，或是唱自己寫的歌叫「爸爸我們想念你」。她現在在美國，要寫完她的論文然後才回台灣來，所以我們只能在網路上見面。

她是一個很活潑的人，當她笑的時候，好像到處都亮起來。我跟她在一起，什麼都是好玩的。我那麼迷她，難怪她願意跟我結婚。

謝謝大家。

So, this one's for you honey.

Talk to you all later, BB

A week goes by

So, it's been a week since YT went back to the States. I may not have mentioned last time that it was very difficult for her to go back on her own, and arriving at home (after a day or so with my parents) was probably the toughest part. Right after she'd left Taiwan, I found that the worst part was seeing the small things that reminded me of her -- the shirt she'd left on the floor, photos from our first anniversary trip, the jar of Nutella that she'd bought for me, and so on. We'd only been here for a few weeks, so I thought it would be even more difficult for her when she gets back to our apartment -- more memories, and more things to trigger them. As she writes on her blog, that was basically the case. Even the jug of milk was difficult to look at because I'm the one who always eats cereal and uses up the milk. At least she had Oliver to greet her, though, and he didn't hide out of anger or fear as he sometimes does when we've been gone for a little while. (My brother must have done a good job of taking care of him the last few weeks, thanks Chad!).

It took a few days to adjust for the both of us, but I think things are much better now. We've worked out a good webcam-chat schedule, and it does help alot to be able to see and hear the other person. Also, YT had been the only one in the apartment for the first few days, but now that's changed. Her roommate was in Taiwan the last three weeks, and just returned the other night. She is a remarkably good person, very thoughtful and kind, and also did a great job of caring for Oliver while we were gone even though she'd never really been around cats before. So, I know YT is in good company.

There's one other factor that's been helping YT out. She has several friends right now who are separated from their husbands or boyfriends, each for different reasons, so she has a lot of people to commiserate with. In some cases, the situation is worse than YT's, which seriously puts things in the right perspective for her.

So, things are going alright now, and we really don't have that much to complain about, other than web cameras that don't always function well, and the fact that we have to use them.

I hope all is well with you and yours. Till next time, BB

Parting

Back to Pittsburgh...though by myself.
Parting from my dear husband and back to the city filled with our memories is worse and more unbearable than I though it would be.

Parting -- NOT so sweet.

I just recently saw my wife get on a plane bound for home, and I won't see her for at least a couple of months. For some reason, right now that pithy saying in Romeo&Juliet (of all things) is one of the first things that comes to mind, and it really bugs me. I'll grant it to Juliet that she was young and naive, and 'parting' for just one night, so what does she know about sorrow (at least, up until the last act). Right now, I don't feel anything that could quite be considered sweet. Even though we knew this was coming, and was a recognized possibility even when we were dating, it doesn't make it any better.

In case you're wondering why YT doesn't just stay here with me and the rest of her family, well, it has to do with her green card. We applied early this year, and were really hoping to receive it before we left to come to Taiwan. It still hadn't arrived by the day we had to leave, so we'd made arrangments with a friend to send it to TW through the mail when it came, which would have been a big worry and an extra headache. But, fortunately, as it turns out, we realized half an hour outside of Pittsburgh that we'd forgotten the plane tickets, so we went back to get them. Guess what the mailman had delivered just after we had left that morning? Yep, the green card. So we didn't have to have it sent to us. I like that story, but it's not my point.

The point is that it's a conditional green card, which means we have to be married for at least two years before we can apply to have the conditional status removed, at which point it would be unconditional and/or permanent (yay). If we don't succeed in having it removed, it's very bad news. We'd have to go through the whole application process from the beginning, which is now even more expensive and a bigger pain in the tuckus than it was before. Officially, it's okay for her to be abroad through the duration allowed by her travel documents, which is about a year. However, we were counselled that if she is gone too long, regardless of having the proper legal documentation, the government could think she might abandon her residency and isn't serious about living in the US. They could make that claim at least, and that would likely mean the conditional status would not be removed. We were told that she could still go abroad, but the total amount shouldn't exceed a certain number of months. So, she'll spend part of her time here in Taiwan, and part of her time back in the US finishing up her dissertation. That's the plan, at least.

So now it's just me and the in-laws, which is going great except for the part where my wife is no longer here too. It's like (perhaps) when you were a kid and your best friend, your favorite person in the world, had to go away to camp for the summer. Things just aren't as fun anymore. I now just have a few articles of left-behind clothing and ticket stubs and pictures, and needless to say, it's not quite enough. We will, of course, also have the telephone and internet chats and webcams, and almost all that the magic of the digital era can provide, but you can't put your arms around a digital picture, even if it's uploading at 30 frames per second. It is much better than nothing, granted; however I do hate the feeling that, as it may come to seem, my wife flew to Pittsburgh and somehow ended up getting stuck inside my computer. Strangely enough, she only comes out at certain times of day, and somehow, Oliver is there, too. I guess it's a good thing I never saw the movie Tron.
This is now my wife, sort of:


We do know that my work here will also allow me to (among other things) understand her cultural background and language much better and be a stronger part of her family. So we both think it will have many positive effects in the long run. But for now, though, I have to say, sorry to disagree with you Juliet, but parting is just sorrow. You'll learn that too soon enough, though. If you want some advice, don't pay too much attention to the Friar at the end of Scene 1 in Act IV, but, I'm no literary theorist.

Okay, I've got to go. Till next time, BB

PS: For what it's worth, I should say it does feel really good to be able to communicate using the webcam. It's not as good as face-to-face, of course, but it does help a lot.

It's a Small (Mennonite) World

There is, actually, a couple more thoughts about the funeral I have been experiencing (it will last several weeks). Since I had lived in China for several years previously, it is very interesting to see these kinds of services being performed at all. It is not controversial (in my opinion) to state that traditional Chinese religious practices are much better preserved here, as Taiwan did not witness the Cultural Revolution that took place on the mainland.

In my understanding, Taiwan has also been more open to practices of other faiths, including evangelism from foreign missionaries. Though this had been active in China as well, with different levels of acceptance and rejection through the ages, the church is now supposed to be more indigenous, or at least more independent from foreign influences. There is really only one Chinese protestant church in China, which I attended while I was there. So, it is different to be here and witness the presence of different denominations. The Presbyterian Church in Taiwan is by far the most prevalent.

Yesterday, YT and I went to a Mennonite church in Taiwan that is in a nearby neighborhood. The church was started in 1975 by a couple from Lancaster (?? Sprunger), and we found the church through the internet. There were about 30 people there or so this Sunday. The hymns were in Taiwanese, though the sermon was in Mandarin and translated into Taiwanese. For the hymns, I had the choice of either trying to follow the same words as everyone else through the Taiwanese hymnal, or knowing more of the meaning through the Mandarin hymnal, or choose one and just sing 'oo' to the right notes. Most of the time I chose the latter. I'm not used to translations being given, so I found it hard to stop paying attention when it is said in Taiwanese. That means I was still trying to follow what was being said in a language I can't understand, no matter how hard I concentrate, and it got very tiring. YT was suggesting during the service that I try to go to an English-Chinese church in the city, and I was thinking that would be a good idea.

We were, naturally, introduced during the guest-introduction time, and there was a sound of general approval when I said I am a Mennonite. After the service, everyone was very welcoming, and we were invited several times to stay afterwards to have lunch with them, sort of a weekly potluck. We at first declined, since I wasn't sure whether I'd keep coming in the future, and we said we had things to do. We kept talking with people, though, and several did speak English pretty well. It also turns out that the pastor's son had studied at Carnegie Mellon, so he was familiar with Pittsburgh. A lot of others had at least one child studying in the US. Someone soon announced that lunch was ready, and we had no option but to stay : ) Everyone was very welcoming, and it really did have a similar feeling to the small Mennonite churches I've attended or been part of in the US. So, I'll likely go back, whether I can understand well enough or not.

Anyway, tomorrow is Mid-Autumn Festival, so no classes today or tomorrow. There is already a small gathering of family out on the porch getting ready to barbeque, and I fear being anti-social if I keep writing right now.

So, till later, and happy harvest time! BB

台灣補請的照片

我知道我很懶
補請已經過了一個月,我居然還沒有把照片po出來

The Funeral (or, Plans Interrupted, part II)

Okay, part II. We left Tainan and got back to Taibei around 630 or so, then went to visit with the rest of the family and pay our respects. There were already a lot of the family there, sitting around talking, eating, drinking tea, and folding paper money to burn. I have to say, it was (obviously) very different from funerals I'd attended in the US. It did feel as if there was a greater deal of fear of death involved in the process. Dad gave YT and I a leaf to hold that was supposed to help ward off, well, anything 'otherworldly' that might affect us negatively. We were supposed to wash our face from a bucket with some herbs in it before we went home for the evening, again, to ward off potentially bad things that might linger around us otherwise.

As I'm a Christian and most of YT's family follow Buddhist traditions, I also couldn't help but reflect on the differences in cultural practices. The preparations being made were to help YT's grandfather's soul make it safely into the afterworld, and to have a prosperous eternity after that. There were also a lot of prayers to beseech him to bless the rest of the family while he's there. Fundamentally, that seems to be (and as YT has said) a lot of what it's about. With these emphases, I feel I haven't had a chance to learn about YT's grandfather's life and who he was while he was here. I haven't seen much to recall the past, relive memories, and honor and cherish a father, grandfather, or friend, or to glorify the legacy of one who has been in this world for 98 years. I miss that aspect of funerals in my own tradition, and I know that YT does as well.

This is not to say that the family is not doing something special to commemorate YT's gradfather and his long life. Since he lived to the age of 98, the family wanted to hold a very traditional service, which is not as commonly performed as before. I can't quite figure out what is or is not often done now, but in this case, the period of mourning will last for about 1-2 months for a traditional funeral. The funeral will be conducted in cycles, the beginning of which I had the opportunity to observe. I was even invited (ok, ok, given advanced permission) to take pictures, some of which are posted here. The first of the cycles will take place this Saturday (the 22nd).

The point of the service was essentially to help YT's grandfather cross into the afterworld safely and not feel a desire to come back. The services have been held in the family's garage, since (as mentioned) he passed away at home (actually, the eldest son's home where he'd been in hospice care). There was the general chanting of scriptures and bowing, along with the banging of cymbals and drums and playing of reed instruments you'd associate with Chinese opera. In one part, one of the service-leaders hired for the occasion went person-to-person with a string tied loosely around his finger. Each person was to tug on the string to untie it, which symbolized a final release of unfulfilled desires. At another point, the monks ran around and around the altar in the middle of the room, with one of them carrying a scripture, one a paper horse, and one a paper figure. This was to represent a horse riding ahead to inform the necessary 'authorities' in the afterworld that YT's grandfather was coming. It did really look the the guys were having fun : )

One other aspect involved one of the monks taking a basic roll call, reading the names of the family, each of whom would say 'here' (if someone wasn't there, someone else would attest their presence on their behalf). There was also a ritual involving the family walking around the altar in a large circle. A basin of water had been placed underneath it, and the family stepped one-by-one onto a small platform nearby that represented a bridge. This was, of course, to help YT's grandfather make the trip successfully. The evening ended with the whole family sitting outside with two metal basins piled high with paper money, which was burnt to ensure that YT's grandfather would not want of anything.

I am glad to learn more about YT's culture and background, and to be part of the family in this fashion. I have really appreciated the way the family gets together to help each other out at this time. However, I couldn't help but think that, well, I'm glad to have a belief where my eternal rest does not depend on what my family does on my behalf after I'm gone. I appreciate the thought that some representation of Jesus (or Peter) will be there to help and comfort me. In a more cynical sense, I'd also prefer to keep representations of money and riches out of my conceptions of what comes next. Sometimes people here are known to burn effigies of BMWs or large houses in hopes that their loved-ones will have a better after-life. I'd rather think that heaven is devoid of brand-consciousness and affluence, and that there are no streets paved with gold. If Heaven means coming more fully into the presence of God, well, what could possibly compare with that?

A lot more could be said about comparative practices of faith systems in Taiwan and the US, and of YT and myself, but I think I will just leave it at that. It's probably long enough already, and well, I'm no expert. I will say, though, that I highly appreciate the view of God and heaven that C.S. Lewis implies in Till We Have Faces. It is part of why I am a deeply committed Christian but more agnostic toward other faiths. I can't know the answer, and in some ways, it's not really the right question to be asking. He writes, “I know now, Lord, why you utter no answer. You are yourself the answer. Before your face questions die away. What other answer would suffice? Only words, words; to be led out to battle against other words.”

Peacefully, and respectfully, yours in Christ, BB

Plans Interrupted (part I)

Well, as I'd mentioned, last weekend was rather interesting. YT and I left last Friday for Tainan in the south to visit some friends and look aroud. We took the train, and it took us about four hours to get there. Our friend picked us up, then we went to the 17th century Confucian Temple, then another friend (and one of her friends) came to meet us for dinner. Tainan is famous for it's xiao chi [小吃] which is in essence similar (in size/function but not in taste) to Spanish tapas, and that's pretty much what we had to eat. Then we went to a night market to walk around (though it was packed), then drove out to the seashore to sit for a while. The next day we saw a lot of other things, including what had been Fort Zeelandia and Fort Provincia when Taiwan was a Dutch colony in the early and mid-17th century, and ate more xiao chi. This pic was taken at a place that makes tea out of dong gua [冬瓜], or winter melon. Not sure about the details : ) There are more pictures on my smugmug site here.

We had also received a phone call from Mom Friday evening that YT's mother's (biological) father was in deteriorating condition and was being taken to the hospital. He was 98, and had been ill for a very long time and was on a feeding tube, so this did not come as a great shock. Saturday morning we got another call that he was coming home from the hospital. This was actually foreboding news, because people here prefer their loved ones to pass away at home with family when possible. He did, in fact, pass away later that morning.

Although we had planned to go back to Taibei on Sunday, we decided to head back Saturday afternoon instead. We took the new high-speed railway back, which, as the name suggests, is pretty fast. It's elevated, based on a Japanese design, and was built to compete with cross-island air travel. It took us 1 1/2 hours to get back.

Well, there is more to say, obviously, which I believe I will leave to a future post for sake of thematics and length of posts. Till soon, BB

School called on a count of rain...

...and heavy winds. That's right, no classes tomorrow due to a typhoon about to grace the northern part of the island with it's torrential winds and rain. Yay for me, I guess, since I have a lot of things to do, one of which, incidentally, involves staying warm and dry. I already got soaked walking home from the bus stop this evening (despite my umbrella).

I also want to blog about this past weekend, which you might find of interest. So, keep your browsers tuned to this spot. Till then, hope your days are sunnier and warmer than my next one is likely to be. Cheers! : )

BB

You can also get good information on this weather pattern at the link below, if you are so inclined. http://www.tealit.com/article_categories.php?section=weather&article=typhoon

If you are one of the (apparently) many who aren't sure about the difference between a typhoon, a hurricane, and a monsoon, click, uh, on one of those links.

Addendum: The nephews and neices came over for the day and helped to bake cookies. Though it did rain pretty much all day, the storm didn't really hit that hard here. The news does indicate that it's going to hit China much harder, as this indicates. Just thought you might like to know.

Further Adjustments

So, I'm getting up around 6am every morning, since I have an 8am class. This is taking some adjustments, since, well, I'm used to getting up (and staying up) much later. I have to get up two hours earlier because it takes more than an hour to get there by bus. I was even late twice last week due to the traffic. Ok, I also got off at the wrong stop the first day. I thought it was the right place, even after wandering around and asking a few people, so I was a little perplexed when I (eventually) wandered to the metro station that I thought was in the opposite direction. I just got off at a different branch of the school. The next couple of days I took a bus and the metro, which is much quicker, but I was still late once because of the traffic (really). Since I have a graded dictation every morning right at the beginning of class, I completely miss it if I'm late. So, the only way I to get to class on time was to get up even earlier, around 545am, to get the bus at 640am. Or so it seemed...

YT's cousin, who lives just down the road, heard about my plight from my dad, and he said that he drives past my university everyday on his way to work. He leaves every morning just after 7am. So, lucky for me, I have now been enjoying a chauffered ride on the highway with my cousin-in-law and his wife and child, who also have work and school in that area. It also means that I can, to my extreme delight, sleep a bit later and still get to school half an hour before class starts. I miss out on some quality NPR (podcast) time on the bus ride there, which I was really starting to appreciate, but I still squeeze it in on the way back. It's been working out pretty well so far this week, and it's nice getting to know more of YT's (extensive extended) family, most of whom live in the surrounding area.

Another point of adjustment. As I'd mentioned earlier, I haven't studied Chinese in about five years, and it's taking some time to get back up to speed, especially in terms of writing. This will be the last time I complain about this (I promise), but I not only have to learn the new characters in the lesson, I have to retrain myself to write the characters I used to be able to write, which in some cases are now completely different and much more complex. Since I had been in China earlier, I had more exposure to simplified characters, and so I learned to write those. In Taiwan, as in most places outside of mainland China, they use traditional characters. For those of you not initiated into what this (very significant) difference means to me right here right now in the middle of the expression of these thoughts...

Though I first learned to write the following character (ji3: how many, several, some) in two strokes


I now have to write it in 11 strokes, like this:


Or while I learned the following character (me: a particle) in three strokes


I now write it in 14 strokes as this:


Please don't get me wrong, I appreciate the complex characters as they seem more 'lexically complete', if that makes any sense. However, usually people (with foresight and brains) learn traditional characters first, because it's easier to move to the simplified version later. I mean to make no judgments on the value of one system over the other, it's just a pain to learn simplified characters first. And I mean that literally, since my hand is starting to get tired from all the repetitive character-writing, which is really the only way to learn. But, I'll get used to it.

Okay, that's all the complaining about language study I'll do. Honest. YT is also tired of me talking about it, too, but it may just be because she doesn't like simplified characters all that much. Politics. Anyway, till next time. I have more writing to do.

Your dear family member, friend, or random bloggist, BB

What is the German for 'KimChee'?

A little bit more about the MTC and my class. According to the orientation materials, there are over 1600 foreign students learning Chinese here. Almost 70% of them, naturally, are from Asia. Only about 17% are from any of 'the Americas', and 12% are from European countries. I'm more as likely to hear Spanish or Russian spoken around here than I am English, and Korean or Japanese are definitely more dominant.

My own class somewhat reflects these demographics as well. Out of 8 students, I am one of only two native English-speakers (both from the US). The others are from either Vietnam, Indonesia, South Korea, or Mongolia. So, it is a new feeling to converse with others where neither I or they speak Chinese as a first language. It felt like a new bridge where one hadn't existed before. "What a great opportunity to learn from people of different cultures," I thought to myself, "all thanks to Chinese." Ha ha ha, duh (...).

Yesterday, while I was speaking and learning from a classmate from Indonesia, I saw that she had written a strange combination of Roman letters in her textbook by the vocabulary list. They made no sense to me. "What is this strange combination of Roman letters that to me makes no sense?" I thought to myself again. I quickly recognized, of course, that it was Indonesian, her native language. The textbook is Chinese-English, and she had to translate some of the new vocabulary words to be sure what they meant. With this came the striking realization that my fellow students are essentially studying Chinese through, yep, you guessed it, English.

So, if you need another example of the power of English and it's influence as an international language, look no further than my textbook. It is developed here by the MTC, and all the vocabulary and grammar points are explained in English, and the dialogues are set in the US. Even though me and my kind make up less than 17% of the apparent audience (I don't know if the book is published overseas), I feel like it has been marketed to me. I tried to imagine what it would be like to go to Germany to learn German, and all the textbooks are in, say, Korean, and set in, say, the Korean cultural milieu. Sorry, just a slight obstacle, but if you want to learn German here you have to be proficient in Korean first. How do you say 'kimchee' in German, anyway?

I know, I know, of course it's in English, you might say, what other language should the MTC use to publish their book? Anything but English would marginalize a whole swath of students who don't speak, say, for instance (again), Korean. There would also be a lot of prestige lost, because using English means much more and says much more about you worldwide than does knowing (say) Korean. It would imply that the MTC is competing on a regional basis rather than the global market, or second- rather than first-rate. I just sort of took this for granted, and I'm pretty sure that my classmates did/do too. That is the pervasiveness and power of language ideologies, or unquestioned assumptions we have about the use of language. "It's just the way things are," one could say, without being further bothered to ask why or how come. I thought I should be more enlightened than that, though.

So, my bubble has been popped (once again), new light has shone into the darkness of my day-to-day assumptions, and I see again the advantages that I have and take for granted. Chinese is hard enough to learn as it is--I'm glad I don't have to do it in a different language. Kudos, and a deeper sense of respect, to my fellow students.

BB

Briefly, and on a different note, the other night I was awoken by a weird feeling of a rumbling under the bed. It felt like the subway train passing by underneath, which is quite strange because the metro is nowhere near here. YT woke up, too, and she said "dizhen [地震]", which means 'earthquake'. I said, "Oh, dizhen [地震]", then went back to sleep two seconds later, once the walls had stopped shaking. It turns out that (according to my teacher) it was the third strongest earthquake to hit around Taiwan, but the epicenter was about 46 miles off the coast, so it had weakened considerably by the time it reached here. It was still strong enough to wake me up in the middle of the night, though no damage was done here. Here's more info if you want it, or for a wider selection, click here.

A little bit of guanxi [關係] helps the student settle in

Hey ya, now that I just finished my first week of classes, I have a bit of time to recuperate. In case you didn't know, I'm in Taiwan through a Foreign Language and Area Studies Scholarship (FLAS), by which I am (officially) studying Chinese at the Mandarin Training Center (MTC) at National Taiwan Normal University (NTNU) in Taibei. Things are starting to settle in, though it did take a few days. Without help from a friend, it would have been much more difficult. Allow me to explain (dot dot dot).

To begin with, it feels good to be studying Chinese formally again. The last (and actually, the first) time I studied Chinese was in an intensive summer program about five years ago. So, my skills have deteriorated a lot since then, and I really need a good review. As a new student, however, I was assigned (based on a screening interview and proficiency exam) to a level that, I felt, wouldn't offer much more than that. After the first day, I knew I wanted something more challenging, and the teacher said I could switch classes. I found out that moving to a different course meant finding a class with available space, or a teacher willing to admit more students.

ENTER, my friend. She had been a teacher at the MTC before, so she knows the ins-and-outs quite well, and she had already told me to call her the first day of class to help me settle in. She is now getting her PhD at NTNU in Applied Linguistics, and still has a lot of contacts among the teachers here. She had also been a teacher in the summer program where I had studied before, so since she knew what level I had already completed she had a general idea of what course here might help me the most. My friend arranged, with a good friend of hers, for me to sit in on a higher level course without having to change my registration, to see first if it would suit me. She also said she is energetic and friendly and a good teacher. The course turned out to be a really good fit, so I officially changed classes right away.

I realized what sort of favor I received when, that day and the next, different students kept knocking on the door to see if they could join our class. In each case, our teacher apologized and said the room was already too full. They then had to go off to find some other class to join, while I continued learning in peace, thankful that I didn't have to go through all that trouble. So, that was very helpful, and it's not the least of it (dot dot dot).

As part of the FLAS requirements, I have to be enrolled in a language course and an area-studies course. I'm essentially at the MTC because they apparently offer both, while another program I wanted to attend (ICLP at NTU) only offers language. Early on, however, a problem arose in that the culture courses listed on the MTC website were deemed, in the words of the FLAS administrator at Pitt, too "Mickey Mouse". Not at all related to an animated rodent, as you might think, but too hands-on or how-to, such as 'calligraphy' or 'cooking'. Though they allow you to experience and commune with traditional cultural practices, they don't really offer all that much content in the broader academic sense.

With further digging into the website, I found other more in-depth culture-related courses, though they were still oriented to language teaching rather than 'cultural content'. It seemed they might work though, especially the courses at the higher levels. My friend offered essential help here, too. She told me that though the courses are listed on the website, they aren't necessarily offered every semester, or at all. Obviously, that was a good thing to know in advance. The solution was that I could take one of the classes individually if there were no other options, so it was decided best to just come and see and figure things out after I got here.

So, after registering at the MTC, it was apparent that only the non-area-studies qualifying classes were being offered, and I would need an individual course. I could have tried to manage through official means to arrange things if I'd had to, but I think it would have been a difficult and time-consuming ordeal. I'm just another student out of hundreds. My friend knew my situation and what I needed, and found a good teacher for me by the third day. She said she had to ask a lot of her friends before finding someone agreeable, and I know it would have been a particular challenge to do on my own. I don't know if I would ever have been able to set up the individual course without my friend's help.

So, a little bit of guanxi (~connections) goes a long way. She's already helped me a lot before this, as well, and I owe her a lot. After thanking her profusely, she said "don't worry, I was already thinking of asking you for help with my English essays next semester." No problem, that's just sort of the way things work here sometimes, and I am very grateful. More later.

你親愛的朋友或家人，
白睿恩
(BB)

Nearly accepted

One thing that has been a big change in my life since coming here, besides the new cultural and linguistic immersion, is the increased precedence of my role as uncle. This is due, naturally, to the greater degree of proximity to my two neices and two nephews (ranging from 7 to 2 years old). As they are very cute and energetic and I'm proud to be related to them, I'll warn you now that they are likely to be a consistent theme through the course of these pages. I've been thinking of introducing them and the family as I go along, and since I have a recent story to tell about the youngest, I might as well start with her.

Being the youngest, everyone calls her MeiMei [妹妹] (sounds like 'may-may') which means 'little sister', though her real nickname is 'TangTang' (tahng-tahng) as she was born on the same day a typhoon hit the island. That typhoon was code-named 'HaiTang' [海棠], thus, 'TangTang' [棠棠]. Her real name is something else, which I can't even remember at the moment. I'll refer to her most often as MeiMei, for your information.

If you can't tell, she's quite adorable. Though like many kids her age (2), she suffers a strong case of separation anxiety when her mother has to be away, even for a minute or two. Ergo, she has constructed a tight circle of trusted confidants around her, among which (as I've observed) only her mother and grandmother and father and grandfather are members, as well as her 4-yr old brother (whom she generally idolizes). There is, further, a strict hierarchy even in this short list of select few. For instance, if her mother has to run errands to which MeiMei may not attend, only her grandmother may suitably fill the central role of comforter and pacifier. A long bout of fury and wailing is required, of course, before the accompanying feelings of loss and abandonment are fully appeased and the necessary shift of alignments may occur. Also, only the above few may pick her up, or do anything that would otherwise attend to her personal needs. Even then, it is only conducted either at her capricious whim or unarguable necessity. Her entertainment, however, is an important exception. This may be accomplished by anyone who attempts to suit her fancy, and she graciously bestows her utterly charming smile on all who succeed (which, thankfully, is pretty often).

I, having been present only a short period of her life, am obviously not among her closest trustees, though I have been working to gain a small amount of her affections through my attempts at entertainment. At dinner one night, I came surprisingly close to success. We were nearly finished eating, and I could see that MeiMei, sitting by her mother at the opposite side of the table, was getting bored. In apparent attempts to appease herself, she kept raising her hand and bringing it down quickly on top of the tray of her high chair. I devised a game where every time Meimei lifted her arm, I would corrsepondingly raise my head. She quickly caught on that the lifting of my head seemed to be under her control, like a puppet on a string. She found this highly amusing, naturally. She even succeeded in tricking me a couple of times by only pretending to lower her hand, but in fact raising it quickly instead, thus causing me to lower my head in contradiction to her completed action. This game was so successful that, to my profound astonishment, she asked her mother to move her high chair next to my seat at the table. Wow, I thought, I'm among the elite! -- even YT or Karrie would have difficulty making such a claim.

Dutifully, Caro got up and moved MeiMei in her highchair to accompany me. My elation, however, was short-lived, crushed as it was by MeiMei's immediate and vociferous wailing in objection to her mother's move back toward the other side of the table. MeiMei was quickly returned in her high chair to her original location, and it was obvious that I was no trusted confidant.

Despite the harsh rejection, I realize now that the role of entertainer is perhaps the best and most suitable anyway. Lots of rewarding smiles, but none of the dirty diapers. Cheers to Uncle-hood!
BB

NOTE: For the purposes of full disclosure, these photos were actually taken last year, when MeiMei was 1yr old, by someone other than myself. I think YT, or one of her sisters, took the photos. So, they don't reflect MeiMei's current age or, unfortunately, my own skills in photography. They do, however, reflect MeiMei herself, and she's still just as adorable.

Watching Flowers Bloom

Chalk up a new thing on my list of experiences I never thought I would have. Okay, don't expect a rush of adrenaline (it wasn't all that exciting), but last night the whole family (YT's sisters Caro & Karrie and their respective husbands and children) came over for a special event. It wasn't just for the sake of coming over (as they often do). This time, the event was the blooming of a special flower that supposedly opens only once a year. It's called 'tan hua' [曇花], and it only opens at night. Dad was really excited the whole evening. The bloom hangs down from the plant like a meat hook, and looks sort of like a wadded-up ball of socks. Then, it opens gradually into a huge white flower with spindles floating off of the sides. It fully bloomed around 930pm, at which point we went outside to accompany Dad on the deck to admire the flowers.

Then guess what we had in our soup at dinner tonight? Yep, tan hua, at least the ones that had bloomed already. Later in the evening tonight, Dad saw that more flowers had bloomed, which was surprising since they had already come out in the spring. Dad said it was because YT was back and they were celebrating : ) Other family came this evening (YT's aunt & uncle, Aunt Meinu, and a cousin and her child) and the process was repeated. More sitting around and chatting, and eating lots of fruit.

At any rate, in the US, I've never had the chance to sit around with family watching flowers that only bloom once a year, and then have it for dinner the next night. It seemed like a special thing. We'll see if the flowers are in the soup tomorrow night.
BB

Real Life Begins

So, Mom and Dad have left now, so it's just me and YT and the in-laws. I'm really glad that Mom and Dad were able to be here to get to know YT's family, background, and culture much better. Mom did say that she felt she 'understood' where YT comes from now and why she is the way she is (sort of). It's really nice to have good parents. It was also fun to get the 'newcomers' tour beyond the areas I've already been, and my new family were wonderful hosts. All in all it was a very good time.

I felt it was also really helpful for me to have more of a smooth introduction into long-term stay here. Though I've been in Taiwan several times before, it's always good to get a 'fresh' perspective, and M&D asked questions I would not have, and were interested in things I just sort of took for granted. It was also very good to be able to use English at such a level. They did very well interacting with the family despite the language differences, and talked even when they weren't sure whether the others would understand or not. Of course there were people to translate when necessary, but I was impressed with how much they took things into their own hands when they could. I know enough Chinese to feel self-conscious about saying things wrong, which sometimes keeps me from speaking at all (I know, I know, this is a common L2 learning impediment to overcome), so they provided a good model of communication.

Now 'real life' here has begun, and will get into full swing next month with classes and interviews. I have orientation at my school next friday, then classes start on the 3rd. I love studying Chinese (formally) when I have the chance, so I'm really looking forward to it. I've never had this extent of immersion in my Chinese learning experience, so I'm hoping improvement will proceed quickly. As I mentioned, it's frustrating not being able to speak as fluently as I'd like. This can be especially problematic when kids are involved, and I'm in a position where I have to set boundaries. But, more on this later. I hope things are going well, and peace to ya'll.
BB

First day in Taipei

We finally arrived in Taipei around 430am local time, a little earlier than expected, even. I realized that a short 24 hours ago we were on the plane to San Francisco. Despite the earliness, my brother-in-law (Dang Liang) and sister-in-law (Karrie) were there to pick us up. YT's neice (WenWen) came along, too, and was so excited the night before that she couldn't sleep very well. I must say, it feels great to have family here...

Note: This post has been mostly deleted for editorial purposes. I got behind in detailing each aspect of the touristy things we did in the first couple of weeks, and it would be too tedious to try to make up the lost time. I also think it's not really the focus of these pages. I did do sort of a photo blog with the pics I posted, which covers most of what had been in this post, plus a whole lot more. Feel free to check it out when/if you have time.
BB

The joys of travel

Hey, hey, glad to see you're back. Day one of the first leg of this journey, and so far we've just become more intimately acquainted with the airports of Detroit (DTW) and San Francisco (SFO). As we were feet from boarding the plane in Detroit, we heard a technician saying something about a "hydraulics leak". To make a long story short, we were supposed to have but a 5 hour flight to San Francisco followed by a 4 hour layover, then a 12 hour flight to Taipei. Now, thanks to the 4 hour delay in Detroit to fix the plane, we are now also enjoying an extra 7 hour layover in SFO since we (just barely) missed our connecting flight to Taipei. Our new flight now leaves at 130am, SFO time, which by my watch is about 430am Pittsburgh time. The joys of airline travel, they are never ending.

Our First Post

Hi, welcome to our first post! Please watch this space for the great adventures and harrowing tales of navigating cross-cultural marriage, PhD dissertations and fieldwork, and cat ownership.
We hope you enjoy this distilled representation of our lives as they unfold, and please feel free to comment or otherwise drop us a line. We may not be home, but if you leave your name and number we'll get back to you as soon as we can. Thank you very much!
With love,
BB&YT

台灣~~我們來囉!

過去這兩個星期
我們在在一連串的final work,打包,飯局,處理雜事和補請相關事宜
以及和新室友May和家裡借住的新生Karen的陪伴下

小小感動

在我忘記之前快點寫下來

昨天是布先生提論文計畫的日子

綠卡面試 --"勝"

今天是我們等待半年綠卡面試的日子
一開始就被我們的律師告知，面試我們的是一位新來的移民官
也就是說，那種很嚴謹又一板一眼的人

就是心情不好

I am really in the bad mood.
I am still writing this while I have tons of things to busy with.

一周年紀念(二)

結婚後生活上最大的改變就是， 唸書變得很不專心。

我真的不是想為自己找藉口…可是我好不容易在30歲之前順利嫁掉， 但和喜歡的人一起規劃人生藍圖的這種白日夢的我總是還沒做夠。 (對， 學歷高還是普通女生， 還是有少女情懷，沒什麼兩樣。) 想著什麼時候要來生小孩？ 要生幾個？(註三)　將來要搬去哪裡？想要買什麼樣的房子？ 每天回家後吃完飯後就一起躺在沙發上看無聊到不行的有線電視邊看邊罵， 可是就只是喜歡一起窩在沙發上的感覺。等到覺得該去用功了， 又開始在電腦前看新聞，閱讀別人部落格，用msn…然後又快到就寢時間。

一周年紀念(一)

時間過的飛快…我們結婚居然要一周年了！
我們上個月還甜蜜蜜的去海邊度假…這一年的婚姻生活應該不錯啦。

被退件

以前在台灣有捐血的習慣(還有領過榮譽捐血人獎狀)
到美國後...一直不知道自己可不可以(因為我是外國人呀)
所以我是從前年才確定自己可以在美國捐血

媽媽生病

去渡假的第一天晚上
姐姐打電話來說媽媽腹部絞痛(腸子粘黏)住院了
痛到要打嗎啡止痛

日光浴之旅

話說我們其實真的沒有渡蜜月(結婚隔兩天跟13個家庭成員去尼加拉瓜瀑布真的不算渡蜜月~~)
時間上又接近周年紀念日, 所以我們決定要在回台灣前, 兩個人小小渡假去
我堅持要去海邊...因為好久沒有看到海(更多照片在相簿裡)

TFCC tear

昨天骨科復診的結果證實我的手腕韌帶"沒有"撕裂...真的是好險
(醫生show 給我看我的MRI結果..順邊幫我上了一堂手部的解剖課)
不過呢,右手腕的疼痛是來自三角纖維軟骨(Triangular Fibrocartilage Complex-TFCC)受傷

想念

Nathalie一家人應該已經到Huston了吧!

這幾年下來...陸陸續續送走好幾個在Pittsburgh的好朋友

轉貼:娶到賺到~意者下標

在另一個網誌看到的, 覺得很好笑
不過重點是 "娶到賺到第一名是牡羊座"...真好笑
大家快點告訴我老公他賺到了! 呵呵

漫長的骨科門診

在美國看醫生真的不像台灣那樣方便
不論從預約到實際看病的日子
一般整個看病過程要半個小時(一般內科)或一個小時(其他專科)

iPhone新廣告有"台灣之光王建民"字樣喔!!!!

剛剛在電視上看到的
今天半夜(about 12am)在NBC上看到APPLE iPhone 的廣告
廣告裡強調 iPhone能上網的功能

推薦

推薦:咖啡黑潮Cafe Kuroshio + 雷蒙之紐西蘭半自助旅遊

大學朋友前一陣子轉換跑道成了咖啡店的老闆

奧咪歷險記

奧咪是我最近幫Oliver取的新綽號

其實我常常在幫Oliver取綽號..例如:

我的異國婚姻

或許我最近是庸人自擾吧!或許是我寫SAS code寫到抓狂!!最常常上網看一些異國婚姻的網誌。

也許出自好奇，也許出自同理心，在網誌上看到了"台灣女生+白人男生"的組合，所面臨來自外在的眼光及生活文化的上融合與衝突。不少人敘述這樣的婚姻組合(或是dating)常被視為"崇洋媚外"或"為了身分"，也有一些人敘述和男方家人相處的不愉快，不過當然也是有幸福美滿的例子。

新照片出爐

我知道我很懶惰...很久沒有update我的照片
今天晚上我一口氣加了三個相簿
放了一些這幾個月來的照片

Ann Arbor (安娜堡)

五月初我們去了一趟Ann Arbor探望布先生堂弟的女兒(三月底出生的)
他們的女兒Dristi可是個可愛的混血兒(美國+尼泊爾)

終於等到了

等待已久的綠卡面試通知終於在昨天寄達了
這一個多月來我每天都在等待郵差來送信
就是為了等這封信

頭痛

這一陣子大家都在生病
Brian跟我上個星期開始感冒...
沒想到Mika這個星期加入了我們的行列

大力推薦

如果你在Pittsburgh,如果你喜歡騎腳踏車
一定要去Hartwood Acres,開車大概30-40分鐘

小小抱怨

說也奇怪
幾個星期前在路上遇到一位已經離開Pittsburgh兩年的一個人(不想稱她是朋友,因為小有過節)
(說真的已經不熟,連她回來pittsburgh我都不知道)

Plan Changes

回台灣的計畫要稍微改變了
移民律師建議我不要離境美國超過六個月
而且還是必須在美國有居留證明

祝我生日快樂

今天是我30歲生日
感覺上好像是邁入了人生令一個階段
自從來美國後...生日似乎沒有像在台灣那樣慶祝

順利過關

YA!!!!
我今天中午通過comprehensive exam口試了!!
整個過程算起來還十分地順利

抓老鼠

最近在緊鑼密鼓中準備星期五的口試
趁機跟大家說個笑話

重要消息

小妹我有一件重要的事情要跟大家宣布

~~我們將在今年八月回台灣宴客,詳細時間日後將再公布~~

It sucks!!

If you're reading my blog...thank you!!

This is just another poster about my comprehensive exam. I am forced to reschedule my comps "again" because I have not received all the comments from my adviser.

討厭的 Windows Vista

建議大家要買新電腦請再三考慮
因為目前新電腦都是配Windows Vista
雖然Vista介面很美(弄得跟Mac好像)

更正有關Pitt Networking Software

剛剛跟我們系上的IT的人聊到vista跟pitt networking Software的事情
他說其實不是vista的問題,同樣的問題也發生在xp作業系統
是那個很爛的software改變了wireless connection的設定

best documentary film

今年奧斯卡最佳紀錄片就是"不願面對的真相"
真是高興....今年奧斯卡因為這部片的原因,整個節目的內容結合了不少有關全球暖化的意識
希望全世界有再看轉播的每個人都感受到這部片所帶來的省思

不願面對的真相--中文網站

http://www.uip.com.tw/ait/aboutthefilm.html

我們坐在一枚定時炸彈上面，如果全世界大多數的科學家是正確的，人類只有十年的時間避免一場大災難，足以讓地球的氣候系統一片大亂，造成嚴重的氣候遽變，包括極端的氣候變化、水災、旱災、流行性傳染病大量散播以及致命熱浪，災情之嚴重是我們從來沒有經歷過的，而且完全是我們自己造成的。