Why did the chicken cross the road? (為什麼雞要過馬路?)

我通常是很少會轉寄文章的
除非真的覺得是很 classic or clever 不傳太可惜
以下的文章就是其中之一....extremely hilarious!!
這是我一位美國的朋友轉寄給我的...不知道來源是哪裡
不過轉貼在這兒應該沒關係
如果你不是很了解美國這幾年的生態 (尤其是政治)
大概很難產生共鳴, 可以直接跳到比爾蓋茲(Bill Gates) 或前美國總統柯林頓(Bill Clinton) 那一段
我稍微註解了一下所提到的人(有的是我個人的看法)


Why did the chicken cross the road? (為什麼雞要過馬路?)


BARACK OBAMA: (歐巴馬, 本屆美國總統大選民主黨初選候選人, 非洲裔美國人)
The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a CHANGE! The chicken wanted CHANGE!

JOHN MC CAIN: (麥肯, 本屆美國總統大選共和黨候選人, 老人)
My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON: (希拉蕊, 本屆美國總統大選民主黨初選候選人, 前第一夫人)
When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure -- right from Day One! -- that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.......


DR. PHIL: (活耀於螢光幕前的心理醫生, 是那種很愛出風頭的醫生藝人)
The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must
first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes
after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is
help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT'
problems before adding 'NEW' problems.

OPRAH: (歐普拉, 美國知名下午時段脫口秀主持人, 深得家庭主婦之心, 以感性節目及贈送現場觀眾家用好禮為名)
Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he
wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn
from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to
give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and
not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

GEORGE W. BUSH: (美國現任總統, 老爸也是前美國總統)
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to
know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is
either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

COLIN POWELL: (前美國國務卿鮑威爾)
Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image
of the chicken crossing the road...

ANDERSON COOPER - CNN: (CNN帥哥記者一枚)
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been
allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY:(上一屆美國總統大選民主黨候選人, 含恨輸給布希)
Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it!
It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's
intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

NANCY GRACE: (CNN的一個談話性節目主播,該節目以灑狗血方式主持)
That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his
eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: (美國共和黨的一位知名大老, 我對他不甚了解)
To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: (瑪莎生活大師, 教你如何成為一個多才多藝的家庭主婦, 幾年前因為內線交易坐牢)
No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a
standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price
dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider
information.

DR SEUSS: (美國知名童書作家)
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the
chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: (海明威, 知名作家)
To die in the rain. Alone.

GRANDPA: (某位阿公, 可能是你的阿公)
In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told
us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: (芭芭拉華特, 美國第一個夜線新聞女主播)
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the
chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it
experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its
life long dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: (亞里斯多德,知名希臘古哲學家)
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: (約翰藍儂, 披頭四成員)
Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES: (比爾蓋茲, 微軟總裁....大家應該對微軟產品心裡有數)
I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads, but
will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check
book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of the Chicken. This new
platform is much more stable and will never cra...#@&&^(C% .........
reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: (愛因斯坦...如果你不知道我也沒辦法了)
Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the
chicken?

BILL CLINTON: (比爾柯林頓,前美國總統...就是跟當時白宮實習生露文斯基發生性醜聞的那個)
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of
chicken?

AL GORE: (高爾, 前美國副總統, 八年前競選總統以些微之差敗給布希. 若當時他當選, 美國現在應該不會那麼慘, 他選後致力於解決全球暖化議題, 以他為主軸的電影 "不願面對的真相"勇奪奧斯卡最佳紀錄片)
I invented the chicken!

COLONEL SANDERS: (肯德基炸雞的那個上校)
Did I miss one?

DICK CHENEY: (錢尼, 美國現任副總統, 擁槍協會的超級支持者...)
Where's my gun?

AL SHARPTON: (非洲裔美國人, 是牧師也是政治人物, 激進派之一, 對他了解不深)
Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

In case you didn't notice

Ok, let me ask you a question. What do you think are the odds of there being another guy out there in the world who has the same first and last name I do. It's going to happen of course, but there couldn't be too many, my last name isn't all that common. But, what about if that guy is also married to a woman with a similar-sounding Asian first name as my wife? The odds get pretty steep then, right? Now consider this, what do you think the odds are of that couple also having a blog called "The Life and Times of Brian and [wife's name]"? Probably impossible, you might say. And I might have agreed, at least until YT directed my attention to this.

So, much apologies to Brian and Ching and the life and times to which their blog is devoted. We meant no copyright infringement. I guess we'll start working to come up with a new title. If you happen to be hit with a flash of inspiration or a general good idea, please let us know. Until then, we'll just call it "Our Life and Times", since I'm sure that's definitely not already been taken elsewhere. We'll of course assume you know whose life and times are, in fact, under discussion here (Hint: it's not Brian and Ching).

Alright, that's it for now. Till next time, BB

Back to Pittsburgh

沉寂好一陣子沒有寫我的部落格了
在準備開始update的時候 又突然很想把部落格搬家
我知道我陸陸續續已經搬過幾次了
可是沒辦法...我一直找不到我喜歡的介面

這次...我換到 PIXNET了 也希望是最後一次了
幸好PIXNET有軟體可以將之前無名的東西自動轉貼
所以其實還蠻省事的

anyway, 我在一月中論文口試順利通過後, 終於回台灣了
這條路等的相當漫長..我和布先生分離了近四個月的時間
我終於在1/17回到我親愛的老公及家人身邊
這三個月的日子裡, 雖然沒有在工作, 但也經歷了不少事 (我還在農曆過年後長水痘咧)
能和家人這樣長時間相處是金錢換不來的
然而我也深深體會到自己不適合當全職的家庭主婦
卸下這麼多年來研究所的壓力及忙碌
我頓時覺得自己生活沒有什麼目標...又沒有收入...
開始漸漸厭惡自己
唉~~我就是注定沒辦法當少奶奶

回來美國這幾個禮拜還是沒辦法完全專心
最近正緊鑼密鼓的在寫paper
希望能多發表幾篇文章

布先生再過三個星期就要回來了
我們的生活也終於要恢復正常
過去的這一年.....我們的生活裡有太大的變化
希望未來的一年...我們能慢慢譜出我們未來的藍圖